Empathy

So here I am again wondering what to write about next. It's not that I have no ideas, it's more that I have too many ideas struggling with each other to get out next. "Write what you know," they say. Well, I know about myself, but I've already said everything about myself that I care to right now. I know about computers, but this is the internet and there's an abundance of experts who would be glad to share with you everything you might care to learn. There's one other thing I know about: religious fanaticism. I may not have done a study on the concept, I may not have a degree, but I know about it intimately because I was one, and because I came out the other side.

In the Fall of 2001 I had decided to take an art class. So I was sitting with a dozen other students sketching away when the professor walked in a with a little portable radio and plugged it in. The voice from the little box was speculating wildly about the plane that had hit the WTC tower. No one was sure if it was on purpose or an accident until the second plane hit, then everyone stopped drawing and crowded around.

One of the reasons I dropped out of acting was because I wear my heart on my sleeve. I can't make myself feel emotions the way other people do. I was stunned when I heard the news, but it wasn't out of empathy for the thousands who died in the two flaming towers. Nor did I feel for the millions who had relatives and acquaintances inside. I couldn't make myself feel for them and didn't try to. I was too busy feeling for the bombers.

A similar thing happened a few years earlier when I heard about the Columbine shooting. Everyone was running around saying "What if something like that had happened in my high school? Where would I hide? How could I defend myself?" My heart didn't go out to the victims or their families. I heard about the shooters and thought, "There but by the grace of God go I."

I know all about wanting to die for a cause because I know all about wanting to die. I saw the world in very similar terms while I was growing up. I saw all those rich, decadent people in positions of power, positions they hadn't earned, and wanted to tear them down from their high pedestals. I would have gladly sacrificed myself to do it rather than spend a lifetime in thrall to their regime. As long as civilization continues on its path, there will always be suicide bombers, for several reasons:

1. The Dead are Glorified
No one ever speaks badly of the dead. It may be for superstitious reasons or just political ones but when someone dies they were suddenly the most wonderful, misunderstood person on earth. Coffins get draped with flags and flowers, thousands gather for funerals. Even moreso if you can die accomplishing something noble. Then there's the heaven myth. If the afterlife is so much better than life on earth, why not blow yourself up?


2. Reproductive Restrictions
This deserves an entire blog entry for itself. It's the sole reason so many suicide bombers come out of muslim countries but we in American are not immune to it. If those boys in Columbine had had girlfriends, they never would have done what they did. In Muslim countries, where wives are purchased like slaves, only wealthy men can afford wives, usually at least two or three. Many rich heads of families have extensive harems, and when it comes time for the sons to marry, only the eldest are so favored because of the cost. What does this mean for the younger sons who will never marry? While many deny it, any honest man will tell you that the primary reason we men do anything is because of sex. Throughout history, most soldiers have been single men. We go to war, we innovate, we struggle to obtain sex. Men who get all the sex they want attain very little because they have no reason to. What does this mean in a culture where thousands of young men must go through life unmarried because young women are valuable commodities bought and sold by old, rich, powerful men?


3. Envy and Greed
Here's another one that deserves it's own blog entry. People are animals. We have the same drives as any other animal in nature. One of these drives is the struggle for territory. It's in our nature to want to take what others have. If my neighbor has a nice new car, I want it. Exodus tells us not to covet, but that's one commandment we cannot obey. We have to covet, it's in our nature. In a culture where so many poor are surrounded so few rich and powerful, we all covet wealth and power. If we feel we cannot achieve it through peaceful means we will use violent means instead.


4. The Power of Myth
Growing up, I used to think I was still living in biblical times. That those times never really existed in the first place is beside the issue. I wanted to live in a time of miracles, where God answered prayer by bringing rival nations to their knees with natural disasters. In the Middle East where the stories arose, it must be even harder to live in the present. You want to believe that the stories are relevant today. A muslim looking at pictures of New York must have seen two great towers of Babel reaching for the sky. Pentagons conjure up similar images. Who wouldn't want to try to gain God's favor by destroying those symbols?


5. Hero Tales
Every culture has its heroes: those who braved great odds to achieve the impossible. In reality such individuals rarely act without huge support networks but in the stories they always act alone. We all want to emulate our heroes, to achieve what they achieved, and the myth of the lone gunslinger who accomplishes so much working alone will never go away.

These are some of the reasons I identified more with the bombers than with the victims. I felt the same drives. If I had grown up in a culture like theirs, I would have acted the same way. The dead feel nothing: they're dead.